When a loved one dies, grieving family members and friends often are confronted with dozens of decisions about the funeral and or cremation – all of which must be made quickly and often under great emotional duress. What kind of funeral should it be? What funeral or cremation provider should you use? Should you bury or cremate the body, or donate it to science? What are you legally required to buy? What other arrangements should you plan? And, as callous as it may sound, how much is it all going to cost? How much is a casket? How much are cremation urns? Does sizes make a difference for caskets and cremation urns?
Each year, Americans grapple with these and many other questions as they spend billions of dollars arranging more than 2 million funerals and or cremations for family members and friends. The increasing trend toward pre-need planning – when people make funeral and cremation arrangements in advance and even pre-select caskets and cremation urns – suggests that many consumers want to compare prices and services so that ultimately, the funeral or cremation reflects a wise and well-informed purchasing decision, as well as a meaningful one.
Funerals and cremations rank among the most expensive purchases many consumers will ever make. A traditional funeral and or cremation, including a cremation urn, casket and vault, costs about $6,000, although "extras" like flowers, obituary notices, acknowledgment cards or limousines can add thousands of dollars to the bottom line. Many funerals and or cremations run well over $10,000. Cremation itself can cost anywhere from $700 to $1,500 with no memorial services at all. This amount doesn't include the cost of cremation urns and or cremation urn vaults, flowers, notices, or other extras.
Yet even if you're the kind of person who might haggle with a dozen dealers to get the best price on a new car, you're likely to feel uncomfortable comparing prices or negotiating over the details and cost of a funeral or cremation, pre-need or at need. Compounding this discomfort is the fact that some people "overspend" on a funeral burial or a cremation because they think of it as a reflection of their feelings for the deceased. When was the last time you went in a negotiated for caskets or cremation urns?
To help relieve their families of some of these decisions, an increasing number of people are planning their own funerals and or cremations, designating their funeral and or cremation preferences, and sometimes even paying for cremation urns and caskets in advance. They see funeral and cremation planning as an extension of will and estate planning.
Thinking ahead can help you make informed and thoughtful decisions about funeral and or cremation arrangements as well as the items that will be needed. Items may include caskets, cremation urns, vaults, etc. It allows you to choose the specific items you want and need and compare the prices offered by several funeral and or cremation providers. It also spares your survivors the stress of making these decisions under the pressure of time and strong emotions. Some people decide to buy head stones or cremation urns before they are needed in an attempt to help their family later.
You can make arrangements directly with a funeral or cremation establishment or through a funeral and cremation planning or memorial society – a nonprofit organization that provides information about funerals and cremations and disposition but doesn't offer funeral or cremation services. If you choose to contact such a group, recognize that while some cremation and funeral homes may include the word "society" in their names, they are not nonprofit organizations.
One other important consideration when planning a funeral or cremation pre-need is where the remains will be buried, entombed or scattered. In the short time between the death and burial, or scattering of a loved one, many family members find themselves rushing to buy a cremation urn, cemetery plot or grave – often without careful thought or a personal visit to the site. That's why it's in the family's best interest to buy cremation urns and or cemetery plots before you need them.
You may wish to make decisions about your funeral or cremation arrangements in advance, but not pay for them in advance. Keep in mind that over time, prices may go up and businesses may close or change ownership. However, in some areas with increased competition, prices may go down over time.
It's a good idea to review and revise your decisions every few years, and to make sure your family is aware of your wishes.
Put your cremation and or funeral preferences in writing, give copies to family members and your attorney, and keep a copy in a handy place. Don't designate your preferences in your will, because a will often is not found or read until after the funeral or cremation. And avoid putting the only copy of your preferences in a safe deposit box. That's because your family may have to make arrangements on a weekend or holiday, before the box can be opened.
Millions of Americans have entered into contracts to prearrange their funerals and or cremations prepaying for some or all of the expenses involved. Laws of individual states govern the prepayment of funeral and or cremation goods and services; various states have laws to help ensure that these advance payments are available to pay for the funeral or cremation urn products and services when they're needed. But protections vary widely from state to state, and some state laws offer little or no effective protection. Some state laws require the funeral home or cemetery to place a percentage of the prepayment in a state–regulated trust or to purchase a life insurance policy with the death benefits assigned to the funeral home or cemetery.
If you're thinking about prepaying for funeral or cremation goods, such as caskets, cremation urns and or services, it's important to consider these issues before putting down any money:
Be sure to tell your family about the plans you've made; let them know where the documents are filed. If your family isn't aware that yo've made funeral and or cremation plans, your wishes may not be carried out. And if family members don't know that you've prepaid the funeral and or cremation costs, they could end up paying for the same funeral or cremation arrangements. You may wish to consult an attorney on the best way to ensure that your wishes are followed.
Most cremation and funeral providers are professionals who strive to serve their clients' needs and best interests. But some aren't. They may take advantage of their clients through inflated prices, overcharges, double charges or unnecessary services. Fortunately, there's a federal law that makes it easier for you to choose only those goods and services you want or need and to pay only for those you select, whether you are making arrangements pre-need or at need.
The Funeral and Cremation Rule, enforced by the Federal Trade Commission, requires cremation and funeral directors to give you itemized prices in person and, if you ask, over the phone. The Rule also requires cremation and funeral directors to give you other information about their goods and services. For example, if you ask about cremation or funeral arrangements in person, the funeral home must give you a written price list to keep that shows the goods and services the home offers. If you want to buy a cremation urn, casket or outer burial container, the funeral provider must show you descriptions of all available cremation urns selections and the prices before actually showing you the cremation urns or caskets.
Many cremation and funeral providers offer various "packages" of commonly selected goods and services that make up a cremation or funeral. But when you arrange for a cremation and or funeral, you have the right to buy individual goods and services. Some items may include: Casket, cremation urn, or vault. That is, you do not have to accept a package that may include items you do not want.
- You have the right to choose the funeral and or cremation goods and services you want (with some exceptions).
- The cremation and or funeral provider must state this right in writing on the general price list for all cremation urns, caskets, vaults, etc.
- If state or local law requires you to buy any particular item, the funeral provider must disclose it on the price list, with a reference to the specific law.
- The cremation and or funeral provider may not refuse, or charge a fee, to handle a cremation urn or casket you bought elsewhere.
- A funeral provider that offers cremations must make alternative cremation containers available.
What Kind of Funeral/Cremation Do You Want?
Every family is different, and not everyone wants the same type of funeral and or cremation. Funeral and cremation practices are influenced by religious and cultural traditions, costs and personal preferences. These factors help determine whether the funeral and or cremation will be elaborate or simple, public or private, religious or secular, and where it will be held. They also influence whether the body will be present at the funeral or memorial service before cremation, if there will be a viewing or visitation, and if so, whether the casket will be open or closed, and whether the remains will be buried or cremated and placed in a cremation urn. Cremation urns are becoming more popular as well as the styles are changing. Cremation urns are now seen as a lovely sculptural piece of art. Cremation urns are a wonderful way to keep your loved one close by in a lasting memorial you and your family can cherish for years to come.
Among the choices you'll need to make is whether you want one of these basic types of funerals and or cremations, or something in between.
"Traditional," full-service funeral/Cremation
This type of funeral and or cremation service, is often referred to by funeral providers as a "traditional" funeral or cremation, usually includes a viewing or visitation and formal funeral/Cremation service, use of a hearse to transport the body to the funeral site and cemetery, and burial, entombment or cremation of the remains.
It is generally the most expensive type of funeral. In addition to the funeral home's basic services fee, costs often include embalming and dressing the body; rental of the funeral home for the viewing or service; and use of vehicles to transport the family if they don't use their own. The costs of a cremation urn, casket, vault, cemetery plot or crypt and other funeral goods and services also must be factored in.
| Every family is different, and
not everyone wants the same type of funeral. |
Direct burial
The body is buried shortly after death, usually in a simple container. No viewing or visitation is involved, so no embalming is necessary. A memorial service may be held at the graveside or later. Direct burial usually costs less than the "traditional," full-service funeral. Costs include the funeral home's basic services fee, as well as transportation and care of the body, the purchase of a casket or burial container and a cemetery plot or crypt. If the family chooses to be at the cemetery for the burial, the funeral home often charges an additional fee for a graveside service.
Direct cremation
The body is cremated shortly after death, without embalming. The cremated remains are placed in a cremation urn or other container. No viewing or visitation is involved, although a memorial service may be held, with or without the cremated remains present in a cremation urn. The remains can be kept in the home in a cremation urn, buried or placed in a crypt or niche in a cemetery, or scattered in a favorite spot. Direct cremation usually costs less than the "traditional," full-service funeral. Costs include the funeral home's basic services fee, as well as transportation and care of the body. A crematory fee may be included or, if the funeral home does not own the crematory, the fee may be added on. There also will be a charge for a cremation urn or other container. The cost of a cemetery plot or crypt is included only if the remains are buried or entombed.
Funeral providers who offer direct cremations also must offer to provide an alternative cremation urn container that can be used in place of a casket. Most providers also carry caskets, vaults, and cremation urns.
Choosing a Cremation and or Funeral Provider
Many people don"t realize that they are not legally required to use a funeral home to plan and conduct a funeral. However, because they have little experience with the many details and legal requirements involved and may be emotionally distraught when it's time to make the plans; many people find the services of a professional funeral home to be a comfort.
Consumers often select a funeral home or cemetery because it's close to home, has served the family in the past, or has been recommended by someone they trust. But people who limit their search to just one cremation or funeral home may risk paying more than necessary for the funeral and or cremation and often times narrowing their selection of cremation urns as well as caskets.
Comparison shopping need not be difficult, especially if it's done before the need for a cremation urn or a casket arises. If you visit a funeral home in person, the funeral provider is required by law to give you a general price list itemizing for the cost of caskets, cremation urns, vaults and other services the home offers. If the general price list does not include specific prices of cremation urns, vaults, caskets or outer burial containers, the law requires the funeral director to show you the price lists for those items before showing you the items.
Sometimes it's more convenient and less stressful to "price shop" funeral homes by telephone. The Funeral and Cremation Rule requires directors to provide price information over the phone to any caller who asks for it. In addition, many funeral homes are happy to mail you their price lists, although that is not required by law.
When comparing prices for cremation urns and caskets, be sure to consider the total cost of all cremation urns as well as other needed items together, in addition to the costs of smaller single items. Every funeral home should have price lists that include all the items essential for the different types of arrangements it offers. Many funeral homes offer package cremations and or funerals that may cost less than purchasing individual items or services. Offering package cremations and or funerals is permitted by law, as long as an itemized price list also is provided. But only by using the price lists can you accurately compare total costs.
| Be sure to consider
the total cost
of all the items.
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In addition, there's a growing trend toward consolidation in the funeral home industry, and many neighborhood funeral homes are thought to be locally owned when in fact, they're owned by a national corporation. If this issue is important to you, you may want to ask if the funeral home is locally owned.
Funeral/Cremation Costs
Funeral/Cremation costs include:
1. Basic services fee for the cremation and or funeral director and staff
The Funeral and Cremation Rule allows funeral and or cremation providers to charge a basic services fee that customers cannot decline to pay. The basic services fee includes services that are common to all funerals and or cremations, regardless of the specific arrangement. These include funeral/Cremation planning, securing the necessary permits and copies of death certificates, preparing the notices, sheltering the remains, and coordinating the arrangements with the cemetery, crematory or other third parties. The fee does not include charges for optional services or cremation urn merchandise.
2. Charges for other services and cremation urn merchandise
These are costs for optional goods and services such as transporting the remains; embalming and other preparation; use of the funeral home for the viewing, ceremony or memorial service; use of equipment and staff for a graveside service; use of a hearse or limousine; a casket, cremation urn vault, cremation urns, outer burial container or alternate container; and cremation or interment.
3. Cash advances
These are fees charged by the cremation and funeral home for goods and services it buys from outside vendors on your behalf, including flowers, obituary notices, pallbearers, officiating clergy, and organists and soloists. Some cremation and funeral providers charge you their cost for the items they buy on your behalf. Others add a service fee to their cost. The Funeral and Cremation Rule requires those who charge an extra fee to disclose that fact in writing, although it doesn't require them to specify the amount of their markup. The Rule also requires funeral and cremation providers to tell you if there are refunds, discounts or rebates from the supplier on any cash advance item.
Calculating the Actual Cost
The funeral and or cremation provider must give you an itemized statement of the total cost of the funeral or cremation goods and services you have selected when you are making the arrangements. If the funeral or cremation provider doesn't know the cost of the cash advance items at the time, he or she is required to give you a written "good faith estimate." This statement also must disclose any legal, cemetery or crematory requirements that you purchase any specific funeral or cremation goods or services.
The Funeral and Cremation Rule does not require any specific format for this information. Funeral and cremation providers may include it in any document they give you at the end of your discussion about funeral or cremation arrangements.
Services and Products
Embalming
Many funeral homes require embalming if you're planning a viewing or visitation. But embalming generally is not necessary or legally required if the body is buried or cremated and being placed in a cremation urn shortly after death. Eliminating this service can save you hundreds of dollars. Under the Funeral and Cremation Rule, a funeral provider:
- May not provide embalming services without permission.
- May not falsely state that embalming is required by law.
- Must disclose in writing that embalming is not required by law, except in certain special cases.
- May not charge a fee for unauthorized embalming unless embalming is required by state law.
- Must disclose in writing that you usually have the right to choose a disposition, such as direct cremation or immediate burial, which does not require embalming if you do not want this service.
- Must disclose in writing that some funeral and cremation arrangements, such as a funeral or cremation with viewing, may make embalming a practical necessity and, if so, a required purchase.
Caskets and Cremation Urns
For a "traditional," full-service funeral:
A casket or a cremation urn is often the single most expensive item you'll buy if you plan a "traditional," full-service funeral or memorial service. Caskets and cremation urns vary widely in style and price and are sold primarily for their visual appeal. Cremation urns that are design today look more like beautiful pieces of art.
Typically caskets are constructed of metal, wood, fiberboard, fiberglass or plastic. Although an average casket costs slightly more than $2,000, some mahogany, bronze or copper caskets sell for as much as $10,000. On the other hand Cremation urns are made of a wide variety of materials also which include: titanium, brass, wood, glass, alabaster, and ceramic. Cremation urns can cost anywhere from $50 to as much as $4,000. The average cremation urn costs about $400.
When you visit a funeral home or showroom to shop for a casket or cremation urn, the Funeral and Cremation Rule requires the funeral director to show you a list of caskets and cremation urns the company sells, with descriptions and prices, before showing you the caskets or cremation urns. Industry studies show that the average casket or cremation urn shopper buys one of the first three models shown, generally the middle-priced of the three.
Caskets and Cremation Urns
vary widely in style
and price. |
So it's in the seller's best interest to start out by showing you higher–end caskets and cremation urns. If you haven't seen some of the lower–priced caskets and cremation urns on the price list, ask to see them – but don't be surprised if they're not prominently displayed, or not on display at all.
Traditionally, caskets and cremation urns have been sold only by funeral homes. But with increasing frequency, showrooms and websites operated by "third-party" dealers are selling caskets as well as cremation urns. You can buy a casket or cremation urn from one of these dealers and have it shipped directly to the funeral home. The Funeral and Cremation Rule requires funeral homes to agree to use a casket or cremation urn you bought elsewhere, and doesn't allow them to charge you a fee for using it.
No matter where or when you're buying a casket or cremation urn, it's important to remember that its purpose is to provide a dignified way to move the body before burial or cremation. No casket, regardless of its qualities or cost, will preserve a body forever. Metal caskets frequently are described as "gasketed," "protective" or "sealer" caskets. These terms mean that the casket has a rubber gasket or some other feature that is designed to delay the penetration of water into the casket and prevent rust. The Funeral and Cremation Rule forbids claims that these features help preserve the remains indefinitely because they don't. They just add to the cost of the casket.
Most metal caskets are made from rolled steel of varying gauges – the lower the gauge, the thicker the steel. Some metal caskets come with a warranty for longevity. Wooden caskets generally are not gasketed and don't have a warranty for longevity. They can be hardwood like mahogany, walnut, cherry or oak, or softwood like pine. Pine caskets are a less expensive option, but funeral homes rarely display them. Manufacturers of both wooden and metal caskets usually warrant workmanship and materials.
For cremation:
Many families that opt to have their loved ones cremated rent a casket from the funeral home for the visitation and funeral, eliminating the cost of buying a casket. If you opt for visitation and cremation, ask about the rental option. For those who choose a direct cremation without a viewing or other ceremony where the body is present, the funeral provider must offer an inexpensive unfinished wood box or alternative container, a non–metal enclosure – pressboard, cardboard or canvas – that is cremated with the body.
Under the Funeral and Cremation Rule, funeral directors who offer direct cremations:
- May not tell you that state or local law requires a casket for direct cremations, because none do;
- Must disclose in writing your right to buy an unfinished wood box or an alternative container for a direct cremation; and
- Must make an unfinished wood box or other alternative container available for direct cremations.
Burial Vaults or Grave Liners
Burial vaults or grave liners, also known as burial containers, are commonly used in "traditional," full-service funerals. The vault or liner is placed in the ground before burial, and the casket is lowered into it at burial. The purpose is to prevent the ground from caving in as the casket deteriorates over time. A grave liner is made of reinforced concrete and will satisfy any cemetery requirement. Grave liners cover only the top and sides of the casket. A burial vault is more substantial and expensive than a grave liner. It surrounds the casket in concrete or another material and may be sold with a warranty of protective strength.
State laws do not require a vault or liner, and funeral providers may not tell you otherwise. However, keep in mind that many cemeteries require some type of outer burial container to prevent the grave from sinking in the future. Neither grave liners nor burial vaults are designed to prevent the eventual decomposition of human remains. It is illegal for funeral providers to claim that a vault will keep water, dirt or other debris from penetrating into the casket if that's not true.
Before showing you any outer burial containers or cremation urns, a funeral provider is required to give you a list of prices and descriptions. It may be less expensive to buy an outer burial container or a cremation urn from a third–party dealer than from a funeral home or cemetery. Compare prices from several sources before you select a cremation urn model or an outer burial container.
Preservative Processes and Products
As far back as the ancient Egyptians, people have used oils, herbs and special body preparations to help preserve the bodies of their dead. Yet, no process or products have been devised to preserve a body in the grave indefinitely. The Funeral and Cremation Rule prohibits funeral providers from telling you that it can be done. For example, funeral and cremation providers may not claim that either embalming or a particular type of casket will preserve the body of the deceased for an unlimited time.
Cemetery Sites
When you are purchasing a cemetery plot, consider the location of the cemetery and whether it meets the requirements of your family's religion. Other considerations include what, if any, restrictions the cemetery places on burial vaults purchased elsewhere, the type of monuments or memorials it allows, and whether flowers or other remembrances may be placed on graves.
Cost is another consideration. Cemetery plots can be expensive, especially in metropolitan areas. Most, but not all, cemeteries require you to purchase a grave liner, which will cost several hundred dollars. Note that there are charges – usually hundreds of dollars – to open a grave for interment and additional charges to fill it in. Perpetual care on a cemetery plot sometimes is included in the purchase price, but it's important to clarify that point before you buy the site or service. If it's not included, look for a separate endowment care fee for maintenance and grounds keeping.
If you plan to bury your loved one's cremated remains that have been places in a cremation urn in a mausoleum or columbarium, you can expect to purchase a crypt and pay opening and closing fees, as well as charges for endowment care and other services. The FTC's Funeral and Cremation Rule does not cover cemeteries and mausoleums unless they sell both funeral and cremation goods as well as have funeral and cremation services, so be cautious in making your purchase to ensure that you receive all pertinent price and other information, and that you're being dealt with fairly.
Veterans Cemeteries
All veterans are entitled to a free burial in a national cemetery and a grave marker. This eligibility also extends to some civilians who have provided military-related service and some Public Health Service personnel. Spouses and dependent children also are entitled to a lot and marker when buried in a national cemetery. There are no charges for opening or closing the grave, for a vault or liner, or for setting the marker in a national cemetery. The family generally is responsible for other expenses, including transportation to the cemetery. For more information, visit the Department of Veterans Affairs' website.
In addition, many states have established state veterans cemeteries. Eligibility requirements and other details vary. Contact your state for more information.
Beware of commercial cemeteries that advertise so-called "veterans' specials." These cemeteries sometimes offer a free plot for the veteran, but charge exorbitant rates for an adjoining plot for the spouse, as well as high fees for opening and closing each grave. Evaluate the bottom-line cost to be sure the special is as special as you may be led to believe.